So . . . with some verses, it really makes a difference as to which version you’re reading. I don’t know that the verse which caught my attention this morning would have done so if I had read it first in another version . . . but in the NKJV it grabbed me . . . reminding me, that for married Christians, how much of the reality of our faith is first evidenced in the privacy of our marriage relationships. If it ain’t happening there, you gotta wonder how “real” it is in the public arena. So here’s the verse as I read it in my Bible this morning . . .

“Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.” (1Corinthians 7:3)

Ok, so I know enough from the contest that the “affection” spoken of is an euphemism for marital relations . . . the first part of 1Corinthians 7 deals with marriage as the alternative to “burning with passion” (7:9). But as I read “affection” it inspires a “warm and fuzzy” for me . . . consistent with an agape, self-sacrificing, sort of love . . . supporting the teaching of Ephesians 5 where men are to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:25) . . . and that, as men, we are to live with our wives considerately and with understanding, giving them honor, gently caring for them (1Peter 4:7). So using the term “rendering affection”, for me, works really well.

When I read other translations it’s a bit more blunt . . . speaking of fulfilling one’s “marital duty” or “conjugal duty”. And, while accurate in the intent, I don’t think it is an accurate literal translation . . . in that the original didn’t use “the blunt word” . . . but the less direct word . . . and I think not just out a sense of propriety, but also because marriage is more than just fulfilled duty.

The original word for “affection” is only used a couple of times in the New Testament . . . a more literal translation might be “let the husband render the due benevolence” or the “due goodwill”. The idea being that marriage is not about what I’m to get and what I’m owed . . .but about what my spouse is due . . . what’s best for them . . . what benefits them. If there was ever a place where we should “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus” where we let “nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind esteem others better than ourselves” . . . where we are to look beyond just our own interests but also consider “the interests of others” (Php. 2:2-5) . . . shouldn’t it be in our marriages?

Isn’t a marriage relationship where we should really learn to give sacrificially of ourselves . . . loving our spouse as Christ loved us . . . everything focused on their benefit and their blessing? Even when things get testy isn’t that where we learn to forgive as God has forgiven us? When the relationship is strained doesn’t the principle of confessing and repenting of wrong in order to restore relationship also come into play?

Go ahead, run any number of scenario’s involving our relationship with the Lord and with others and tell me if it shouldn’t play out in some way within the marriage relationship. Oh, to see men loving their wives as Christ loved the church . . . rendering to her the goodwill she is due . . and to see women responding to their husbands with a spirit of trust and submission to his leadership, confident in his love for them . . . rendering to him the goodwill he is due . . . oh, what a witness to a world that is so whacked out when it comes to understanding “healthy relationships”.

I’m probably stretching the application of this particular verse given its specific context, but I don’t think I’m stretching it that far. Christ has declared Himself the Bridegroom and us His Bride . . . and our marriages are wonderful arenas in which to manifest some the implications of what that means.

Husbands, that we would, in the broadest sense, render to our wives the affection she is due . . . wives, that you would, in the broadest sense, render to your husband the affection he is due . . . as a testimony to the reality and authenticity of Christ in our lives . . . as a witness to a lost world . . . all to the glory of God . . . amen?