I get it when we say, “It’s not about me” . . . until it is. David did too.
After Nathan the prophet had confronted David exposing his adultery with Bathsheba and his murderous duplicity with her husband, when David’s spirit was broken and his heart crushed with contrition, it had to be about him.
His sin had been great. His need even greater. His desperation, greater still.
And out of such awareness of his own sin he pens a song, Psalm 51, about “me.”
Have mercy on me, O God . . .
Wash me thoroughly . . .
Cleanse me from my sin . . .
Purge me with hyssop . . .
Let me hear joy and gladness . . .
Create in me clean heart . . .
Renew within me a right spirit . . .
Cast me not away from Your presence . . .
Take not from me Your Holy Spirit . . .
Restore to me the joy of Your salvation . . .
Uphold me with a willing spirit . . .
Deliver me from bloodguiltiness . .
It’s a song about me which declares a wholly dependence on Him.
Nothing David could do could right the wrong. Nothing David could say could alter the fact that he had sinned against God and God alone and deserved God’s judgment. Nothing David could give could pay the debt owed heaven. Nothing David could build could breach the chasm of broken fellowship with the God he longed after. Nothing he could do, and so, it had to be about what God, in His mercy and grace, would do for him.
Reading also this morning in Romans 3. And reminded that I am like David.
. . . for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God
(Romans 3:23 ESV)
Having sinned against God and Him only. Unable to bring any offering or sacrifice sufficient to atone for my own sin but the offering of a broken spirit and a contrite heart that cries out to God, “Have mercy on me!”
Needing to be justified, to have the debt paid and the stain of sin removed. Knowing that it can never be on on the basis of what I can do for Him. Believing afresh, and acknowledging anew, that it can only be on the grounds of what He has done for me.
. . . justified by His grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by His blood, to be received by faith.
(Romans 3:24-25a ESV)
Washed thoroughly. Purged completely. Delivered fully. Renewed daily. Only because of what God in His grace has done for me.
A clean heart. A willing spirit. His abiding presence. An everlasting joy. Only because of what His Son is doing in me through His Spirit.
Not about me. Except when it is.
Because of grace. For His glory.